Recently, as I often do, I was enjoying a cup of my favorite coffee at a local coffee shop with one of the male participants in our ministry. As we were having some deep conversation about our reality my friend loudly exclaimed, “They just don’t have a clue!”

We were talking about the challenges life presents to those of us who choose to follow an orthodox understanding of what the Bible teaches concerning human sexual expression. He was referring to the fact that many, if not most, Christians have little idea of the amount of pain and suffering we experience in our lives.

As my friend and I continued our conversation I began to weep as I thought about the individuals involved in Sight Ministry. I thought about the hundreds of individual men and women who have come through our doors since January of 2000. I thought about the moms and dads and grandparents who have been devastated by the hurt they’ve witnessed their loved ones going through, watching many of them fully embrace a gay identity because of rejection.

I must confess that I sometimes wonder if much of the Church even really cares. I see our participants as some of the great heroes of our time because they are choosing to follow JESUS rather than the longings of their flesh even in the face of much suffering. And yet many Christians rarely even think about what our participants face every day. Let me share a little of what many of us experience regularly.

Let’s begin with the obvious. If you are straight you most likely have no idea of the anguish our folks go through simply because there are no acceptable options available to express natural sexual desires and longings. Think about that! Let that reality soak in. There are few options for our participants to find romantic relational intimacy or to embrace a life-long loving partner to share life with in marriage. Loneliness can become crippling even when surrounded by great friends. Romantic intimacy and friendship are not the same and do not fulfill the same needs.

Our participants are faced with ridicule from many within the gay community and also from those within the Church. Many in the gay community accuse our participants of being untrue to themselves and living a lie. A large percentage of Christians are homophobic and too preoccupied with their own lives to make any effort to understand their predicament. 

Men in our ministry have difficulty in relating to many men in the church and feel threatened and intimidated by them. Many Christian men tend to keep a distance from other men like those in our ministry. I guess it’s because they fear they might catch a gay germ or something. Or, perhaps, it’s simply because “they just don’t have a clue!”

This says nothing about the experiences our participants have outside of the Church in the workplace, in their classrooms, and within our culture as a whole. Though our culture is becoming more and more gay-friendly most, especially in Christian circles, still do not know what to do with us or what to make of us. Ignorance is not bliss! As a result, most of our participants battle against depression because they feel unloved, unacceptable, un-cared for and misunderstood. They have no sense of belonging and being known.

Join us as we strive to “life-out” our ministry scripture: “The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, Because He anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor, He has sent Me to proclaim release to the captives, and recovery of sight to the blind, to set free those who are oppressed, to proclaim the favorable year of the LORD” – Luke 4:18.